good idea, bad idea

they should make permanent hats for the truly hardcore. or the truly bald.

We will not ever look at each other in the same light ever again

I have all but given up on school work. Mock trial has taken care of that. Tomorrow I have a presentation, econ homework I didn't finish in time and an accounting quiz on god knows what. I haven't been to art in a week. I really need to start going to art class. I'm happy though. Everything else is going okay. People are good. Rock music is good. My goal for next week is to get back into the groove of school and finish the year strong. I am excited for halloween. Costume possibilities = ghost, James Bond Fire? probably a ghost. I need to go to bed so I can wake up and figure out what I am going to do about that presentation tomorrow. I wonder what I'm supposed to wear. I'll wear khakis and bring a coat and tie just in case. No one will even be able to tell. Matching is also not important.

I need to figure out how to not spend all my homework time doing mock trial. I'll get that eventually.

I wanted change in my life and I guess I got it. We'll see how long things last.

Bands I have listened to so much recently I'm getting sick of them:

Against Me!
Andrew Jackson Jihad
At The Drive-In

they all start with A for no particular reason.

I have about another paragraph of stuff I would like to write here but I will not for fear people will discover it.

Ryan

good idea, bad idea

teeter tottering should be a competitive sport. first one to draw blood wins.

Mock Trial

I want to sleep.

good idea, bad idea

I want to write the world's catchiest song ever and name it "this brain". Then people will say things like "I hate having this brain stuck in my head" or "This brain has been stuck in my head all day". Then their friends will laugh at them.

friends

got to see ross and jacob... sweet.

WOOOAAHHH

Despite not finding any mangosteens (apparently they are illegal in the US despite being the allegedly best tasting fruit in the world) I had a very nice evening. Someday I will eat a mangosteen.

if i would have know just how things would have ended up

Evelyn sits by the elevator doors.
It's been 37 years since James dies on St. Patrick's Day in 1964,
but she could not hold it against him.
There were times when there was nothing she could do but lie in bed all day beside a picture of them together...
A picture of better days...

And just like James, I'll be drinking Irish tonight
and the memory of his last work week wil be gone forever...
Evelyn I'm not coming home tonight,
if we're never together
if I'm never back again
well I swear to god that I'll love you forever
Evelyn I'm not coming home tonight...

In all the years that went by she said she'd always love him
and from the day that he died she never loved again.
In his wallet she kept in her nightstand an A.A. card and a lock of red hair.
She kept secrets of pride locked so tight in her heart
it killed a part of her before the rest was gone.
She said, "if I would have known just how things would have ended up I just would have let myself die."

And just like James, I'll be drinking Irish tonight
and the memory of his last work week wil be gone forever...
Evelyn I'm not coming home tonight,
if we're never together
if I'm never back again
well I swear to god that I'll love you forever
Evelyn I'm not coming home tonight...

Yayoi Kusama

You are my hero

In addition

Nevermind.

Where the Wild Things Were

Where the Wild Things Are was a heavy movie. I still think Spike Jonze is a genius. I'm kinda depressed now though. Being a little kid sucks.

"Song About an Angel" by Sunny Day Real Estate is the only song I'm ever listening to again. Ever.

In fact that song should've been the soundtrack to the movie. Karen O is great and all, but she passed up a golden opportunity.

I wish I could split into two. I would have one of me that would continue living life as normal and another one of me that could travel time and be invisible and he would watch the life of the first one. They could talk to each other about what happens in the future or the past and they'd be an awesome team. If bad things happened they would change little things in the past (present?) to correct that but they would never change anything major. Even if they knew a war was gonna happen or something bad like that. That way they would not get confused about moral obligations and stuff that no one really understands anyways. I just hate guessing about the future. But this way I would still have the capability to be surprised. I think that would be awesome and nothing bad would ever happen and I definitely would not abuse it creating horrible situations that I have to get myself out of or use it to manipulate people. I might use it to win sports bets and make money like in back to the future 2. I wouldn't build some super hell casino place like Biff. I definitely would try to find a way to bring back floating skateboards but I doubt my time traveling invisible self could carry objects through the future. He would only be able to transport the physical being connected to him through his soul. I wonder if my hair is connected to my soul. I might be traveling through space bald. And definitely naked because clothes are physical objects. It's okay though because I'd be invisible. I would probably spend most of my time traveling time staring in through windows at people I care about. Hopefully my normal self would also be through the windows because that would mean I am with people I care about. I wouldn't watch myself have sex through windows though because that'd be weird and hopefully I'm not having sex by a window people could see through. The reason I would look through windows is because I can walk through solid mass. I am invisible, not immaterial. My normal self would probably have to fake much gusto about life since he would already know what happened but at least he wouldn't have to stay up all night wondering. During one of my future-normal self meetings, my future self would comically be naked and my normal self would be visibly uncomfortable. Maybe my time traveling self would look back on this and laugh. Mostly because then there would be two naked mes so normal me would be outnumbered. That situation could potentially create a paradox. Time traveling me would be much more bold than normal me but also have a strong desire to switch places as he has lived a life damned to watching himself feel things he hasn't had the opportunity to. I guess I would have to have a single consciousness for that to work. Then I would be able to focus on the benefits and keep priorities in line. I guess this will never happen. Maybe when we die our souls get split like this. I doubt it. There are not nearly enough random naked people for that to be possible.

What if future me and normal me fell in love with two different people??? That would be such a kick-ass story.

I have forgotten how to sleep

I made a lot of mistakes

all things go.

Hello Mother Leopard

Things are a-changin'

come on weekend.
come on wishful thinkin'.
come on Apollon.

All in due time.
Balancing act.
Sorrow.
Forgiveness?
Doubt.
Doubt.
Doubt.
Hope.
Too good to be true?
Please no.
Please no.
No.

Not every song I write will sound like The Pixies.

Henry Cabot Lodge

Hodgepodge
Hedgehog
Sledge Hammer
Nudge

Macadamia

Ooh.


Fuck Youtube ads.

I never know if I'm doing the right thing.

Sometimes you see right through me.

WooooOOOOoooo